13.4.06

Basically it stinks also

This has GOT to be one of the dumbest sequels of all time: A 48-year old slut with no sense of personal hygiene or social norms, foils London’s finest with the help of a few strategically timed leg crossings. I haven’t seen the first since it first aired one M-Net (if you do math you’ll figure out why I’m afraid of women), but even then Stone was getting a little squidgy around the edges. I have read that Sharon Stone’s IQ is in the top 1 percentile too many times to put with this shit. What was she thinking? What happened? “I had a few drinks with Ed Wood having a marvellous time, next thing I know I’m lying in bed wearing an angora sweater. And oh, yes, I seem to have signed up for the long awaited sequel to Plan 9 from outer space: Plan 10 from outer space.” I demand to know who fucked who and exactly where for this to have happened. For somebody that’s supposedly a philanthropist Stone sure is set on inflicting a lot of pain on the movie-going public.

The director is, of course, a genius, a visionary if you will: “The film is set in England to differentiate it from the first one.” Wow! That changes EVERYTHING! If you need to change countries to differentiate a sequel from the original, you’ve obviously stumbled across the next Godfather Part II.

In their defence, they did acquire the services one of the world’s most famous and accomplished actors: Paul Morrissey. You may remember him from such classics as “The Man with no Career” and “Who am I anyway?” I heard they first approached Daniel Day Lewis, but after the lawsuits for defamation of character subsided, wisely settled on Paul Morrissey (I refuse to mention his surname without his name right there in front of it).

At least the first one was directed by Paul Verhoeven, who does get things right from time to time.

To summarise: This movie fills a much needed gap.

Is this the dumbest sequel of all time? Your thoughts please.

2 comments:

tinus said...

She must have a strong compulsion to be the centre of attention. Strong enough to risk her reputation and career. It's a shame she couldn't just keep her dignity because she did appear in a few decent films recently eg Broken flowers and The Mighty even though she took smaller roles. The fact that Stan Collymore (ex footballer known for "dogging" see Wikipedia) appears in this film says a lot. It is definitely up there with Batman and Robin and Speed 2.

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